Strange Love
by Sunflare2k5
Summary: Sequel to "Halloween at the Stacked Deck". What happened to Scarecrow and Harley Quinn once they escaped the police?
1. Chapter 1

Strange Love, Chapter One

By Sunflare2k5

Disclaimer: The characters and places in this story are DC Comics' property,  
and are not being used for profit.

The hearse, only scratched up after its run-in with the police, raced away from  
the Stacked Deck and into the maze of roads and alleys of Gotham's warehouse  
district. Scarecrow, still in his Red Death costume, was at the wheel. And Harley  
was currently trying to extract herself and her hyenas from the tangle of leashes  
surrounding them. "Maybe I shoulda stolen those retractable leashes?" she  
asked. Neither he nor the hyenas answered.

Finally, they reached one of Scarecrow's lairs in a "condemned" warehouse.  
His remote signal got the garage doors open, and he drove the hearse inside.  
Shutting the doors behind them, Scarecrow parked the hearse and headed  
over to help Harley. By then she'd gotten the leashes undone, only to discover  
a new problem. The temperature had dropped considerably during the party…  
and she'd left her coat behind at the bar. Her teeth started chattering once she  
got out of the hearse.

"Well, we can't have that…" Scarecrow remarked, looking around for... ah, there  
it was! A trenchcoat he'd "liberated" during one of his hunts for new lab rats;  
one of the few times he found clothes that fit him. He offered it to Harley; she  
slipped into it, though the way it dragged on the floor after her made her seem  
like she was playing dress-up in her parents' clothes. For a long moment, he  
regarded her; she was such a dear child, too good to be so used by the Joker!  
If only she'd... Under the mask, Scarecrow frowned; that was too dangerous a  
train of thought to continue! He busied himself with resetting the security and  
getting the door to the interior opened.

Harley snuggled into the coat. "Thanks, Professor!" she chirped, as her hyenas  
settled down by her feet. "You're good for now, babies," she told them as she  
bent down to scratch behind their ears with both hands. "Later, when we go  
back --" Her face fell. "But we can't go back! Mistah J threw us out!" Harley  
started sniffling, and her hyenas whined in sympathy.

By now, Scarecrow had shed the rubbery mask and gloves; they were much  
too uncomfortable. At the sound of whining, he turned toward Harley... in time  
to see the first tears sliding down her cheeks. Before he realized what he was  
doing, Scarecrow had stroked her cheek with his fingertips to wipe away her  
tears. "Oh! I shouldn't..." he started to gasp, until she leaned into his touch.

Her next move, much to his surprise, was to wrap her arms around him! He  
goggled down at her, not sure of what he was meant to do now. Then Harley  
looked up and saw his expression. "I -- I'm sorry!" she cried, and flung herself  
away from him. Before he could say anything, she'd run into the warehouse.  
Bud and Lou followed, leaving the Scarecrow alone with his thoughts...

(to be continued)


	2. Chapter 2

Strange Love, Chapter Two

By Sunflare2k5

_She didn't mean it… not really?_ Scarecrow thought. _At that moment, Harleen  
would have clung to anyone – anything! It's just instinct; it doesn't mean that  
she feels anything for me. _He shook his head sadly._ And why __would__ she feel  
anything for me? Compared to her vitality, her beauty… I'm just an ugly old man!  
She'll leave me soon enough, and go back to Ivy… _He frowned._ Or the Joker!  
_Scarecrow sighed, and headed into the warehouse.

He found Harley in the office area, curled up on a ratty loveseat. Her hyenas  
faithfully waited in front of it; they growled a soft warning as he approached.  
Scarecrow backed up a couple of steps. Considering the strength of their  
immune systems, he wasn't sure the fear gas would stop them if they  
attacked. But it would get Harleen to hate him -- he knew that for sure!

She looked up at Scarecrow, then reached down to pet the hyenas. "Calm  
down, you two... It's his place, we're only here cause he lets us." she told  
them. But her voice was flat, nothing like her usual bubbly self. Bud and Lou  
stopped growling, to lick at her hands and whimper. They knew she was  
hurting, but how could they help her?

"About that... occurrence, in the garage..?" Scarecrow started, only to have  
Harley interrupt him. "You mean when you looked like a giant spider had  
grabbed you?"

"You startled me; I didn't have anything against you." he explained, trying  
to keep his voice calm.

Harley waved it off. "Yeah, sure. I should be used ta havin' men throw me  
away by now..." Her voice broke on the last word, and she started crying  
again. Scarecrow started forward, but the hyenas snarled more loudly at him.

Reluctantly, he backed off. "Perhaps... perhaps it would help if you and your  
pets got something to eat? That should help matters..." She didn't reply.  
Scarecrow sighed and backed out of the room.

While he had rigged a generator, most of its energy went toward powering  
his lab equipment. And since he was either too busy or absent for long  
stretches, he just kept canned goods that could be eaten without cooking.  
But for her sake, he figured he could actually cook. Some canned hams would  
have to do for her hyenas. For Harleen and himself, some beef with -- how  
did that corn get in here? He hated corn! Scarecrow sneered at the can and  
shoved it to the back of the cabinet, then got out some peas. He prepared  
two plates, heating hers first and leaving his for later.

"May I come in?" Scarecrow offered at the office doorway. "I have your supper...  
if you like."

Harley looked up. "What about my babies?"

"I have some hams." He shrugged. "I wasn't expecting to feed so many guests."

She nodded. He gave her the tray with her meal, then fetched the hams. Bud  
and Lou seemed much happier with his presence, now that he was feeding  
them. "Did you need anything else, Harleen?" Scarecrow asked her, as the  
hyenas ate their food.

She seemed confused at his use of her real name. "Well, Professor... if you  
wanted ta join us..?"

"Please," he gave her a shy smile, "call me Johnathan."

(to be continued)


	3. Chapter 3

Strange Love, Chapter 3  
by Sunflare2k5

"Johnathan, is it?" Harley grinned, her mood shooting back upwards like a  
yo-yo. She put aside the now-empty plate on the table next to the loveseat,  
then patted the cushion beside her. "Well -- take a load off, Jonny!"

He blinked; that wasn't a name he'd heard since he was a child. "I, er…"

"I won't bite…" she winked. "Unless ya want me to?"

At that, Johnathan blushed brilliantly. He hovered before the loveseat, his  
knees bent slightly as he was about to sit down before that proclamation!  
She grabbed hold of his arm and tugged; with that, he fell back onto the  
loveseat.

"C'mon, it's not like you haven't done this before?" Harley snuggled a bit  
closer, only to have him turn away from her. "You have done this before…"  
A pause, and her voice was softer, uncertain. "Right?!"

He couldn't meet her eyes. "Don't laugh at me…" he hissed between his  
clenched teeth.

"I'm not laughing." Harley punctuated her promise with a gentle kiss on his  
cheek; much to her surprise, he started sobbing. She gathered him into her  
arms, and crooned to him. _Just like Bud 'n Lou, when they was pups…_ Harley  
thought, as she tried to comfort him.

After a couple of minutes, he finally regained his voice, though it was still  
roughened by his tears. "No-one ever touched me, unless they intended  
to hurt me. No-one ever thought I was worthy to be in their presence,  
unless it was to be their victim. Why? Why you – why now?"

"Cause you've been good to me." She kissed his tear-streaked cheek.  
"You saved me." Another kiss, on the opposite cheek. "And you're cute!"

Johnathan frowned. "You must be drunk..."

Harley drew herself up. "I am not!" She reached back, and grabbed up  
the fork from the plate. He flinched back -- until she balanced it by the  
tines on her index finger. "Can a drunk do that? I don't think so!" She  
tossed it away over her shoulder. "Musclebound guys don't do it for me...  
what can I say? I like 'em smart."

"Well, I supp--" He was interrupted as she yanked him into a deep kiss;  
Johnathan's instincts called for him to respond to her... and he did, with  
growing passion. Finally, they had to come up for air.

"Where's your bedroom?" she whispered, nibbling his ear.

"This way..." He eagerly led the way, and locked the door behind them.

(to be continued)


	4. Chapter 4

Strange Love, Chapter 4  
by Sunflare2k5

Harley awoke first, nestled in Johnathan's arms. She startled a bit, before she  
remembered the events of the previous night. And what a night it was! While  
he wasn't experienced, he was gentle with her... and he dedicated himself to  
pleasing her, instead of just satisfying himself. And that was something she'd  
never had before! She grinned, and thought to herself, _Best. Lover. Ever!_

Johnathan opened his eyes. "...Harleen?!" _She is here; she actually could want_  
_me!_ he thought, feeling a sense of triumph.

"Mmmm, Jonny..." she purred, and peppered small kisses over his throat.

"How did I ever deserve you, milady?" He stroked her hair, holding her to him.

She stopped, confused. "Milady?!"

"I didn't offend you, did I?" Johnathan scooted back from her. "I'd read that's  
how you were supposed to speak to your beloved..."

"And in what century was that book written?" Harley asked, then sighed as  
she saw his face fall. "Damn... I messed up again..." Now she was the one who  
couldn't meet his eyes. "Best guy I'd ever had, and of course I screw it up!"

He blinked, astonished. "I'm the best?!"

She looked back at him, shyly moving closer. "Yes. I've had sex... but till you,  
I didn't know about it being love."

Johnathan welcomed her back into his embrace. "My love... my first, my only love..."  
he whispered to her, then kissed her deeply. Their joy and passion overwhelmed  
them again, and it was much later before they could stand to be parted. But other  
needs -- hunger and thirst foremost -- had to be satisfied.

They relaxed together on the loveseat after another meal. He'd changed out of  
the party costume, and found her some clothes as well. "I don't want to leave  
you, Harleen... but I did have plans."

"What plans?" she asked.

"A specialized fear toxin to be released at police headquarters, inducing a  
hysterical aggressive reaction to chiroptophobia." Johnathan seemed quite  
pleased with himself.

"So they can't sit down?" Harley shrugged. "Or do they just haveta use sofas?"

He took a moment to figure out how she'd switched subjects, then shook his  
head. "No, it's nothing to do with _chairs_... chiroptophobia is the fear of bats."

She flinched back once she realized her mistake; the Joker always had punished  
her when she didn't get the joke. Johnathan saw her fear... but this time, seeing  
fear in another's eyes hurt him. He stroked her cheek, and drew her close in an  
attempt to comfort her. Harley finally calmed down, as he rocked her. "It's all  
right... I don't want to hurt you. I don't want you afraid of me..." he crooned to  
her. And he was surprised at himself that he meant it!

(to be continued)


	5. Chapter 5

Strange Love, Chapter 5  
by Sunflare2k5

Once Harley had calmed down (though she still snuggled in her lover's arms),  
she asked him, "You were talking about bats?"

"Oh. Yes…" Johnathan nodded. "Anyone exposed to this will fear bats. But  
instead of running from their fear, they'll try to destroy the object of their  
fear!"

"Oh, I get it! All the cops will be gunnin' for the Bat, instead of chasing after us!"  
She hoped she'd gotten the punchline right?

"Not only that, but as bats are a common Halloween decoration, the police  
will likewise target those in their hysterical aggression. So the law will fear and  
hate the Batman, and the citizens will fear and hate the police…" Johnathan  
grinned wickedly. "And Gotham falls into chaos!"

"Real short fall…" Harley deadpanned.

That startled a rusty laugh from Johnathan. Then he nuzzled her ear and gave  
a soft sigh. "But I'm not sure I want to go out now? I can bring fear anytime...  
but how much longer will I have you with me?"

"As long as you want me... if that's okay?" she offered.

"More than 'okay', Harleen." He smiled and cuddled her closer. "And I'd already  
set the toxins on a remote timer, so -- it's not like I have to be there? We can  
just stay in, and watch the news reports of their attacks."

"Ooh, movie night!" Harley grinned. "Got any popcorn?"

"No. And we'll need some more food, anyway..." His hand drifted down to stroke  
her thigh. "Since we're going to be here for some time?"

"Mmm, smart guy." Harley paused a beat. "Except for the 'no popcorn' thing."

"I never got into that habit; such frivolities were forbidden me." he replied.

"Then it's past time ya got some!" Harley kissed him. "Hold that pose, I'll be  
right back with the good loot!" Before he could think to hold her back, she slipped  
out of his embrace -- then she paused. "Keys, please?"

"Shouldn't we go together?" he asked.

"I want it to be a surprise..." Harley pouted. "Dontcha trust me?"

"Yes -- I do." His smile was touched with sadness; he knew this was necessary,  
but he didn't want to be parted from her. "Return safely, my beloved!"

(to be continued)


	6. Chapter 6

Strange Love, Chapter 6  
by Sunflare2k5

Author's Note: Wasn't getting enough ideas to give Two-Face and Poison Ivy  
their own story. They'll be coming back in here.

Harley headed out in the hearse, then realized something. _I don't have any  
money... but if I steal the stuff, the cops will chase me! Waitasec -- I got some  
cash stashed in one of Mist-- the Joker's, places. I get that and my stuff from  
there!_ She drove to another of the warehouses that had once been used to  
store novelty goods, before the manufacturer had gone out of business.  
The dust showed that the Joker hadn't been there recently... much to Harley's  
relief. The lockbox was still stowed in her mattress, but everything else of hers  
had been ruined by the moisture or vermin. She sighed; at least the cash was  
intact?

Once Harley got back to the hearse, she drove to the nearest grocery store.  
She grabbed a cart and started through the aisles; while she did remember  
to get some canned foods, most of her attention was focused on the snacks  
section. Jonny couldn't know what he'd like, and she liked all kinds of junk food,  
so she grabbed a small bag of just about every flavor of chips and candy that  
were available. Lastly, she got a big bag of dry dog food for her babies...  
Whistling, she paid cash and headed back to her vehicle.

But while Harley had been shopping, Harvey Bullock had noticed the parked  
hearse... and its damage and plates matched those of the Scarecrow's car!  
He called it in, but said that he and Montoya could handle the clown-girl.  
So they waited in their unmarked car till Harley drove off, then shadowed  
her back to the warehouse. Harley had parked, and was starting to unload  
the groceries when Bullock and Montoya surprised her.

"Hold it right there!" Renee yelled, weapon already trained on Harley as she  
leapt out of the car; Harvey was quick to back up his partner. So shocked was  
Harley at this, that she dropped the dog food on her foot -- all fifty pounds!  
Harley was immobilized by this, allowing the cops to close in on her and prepare  
to handcuff her... but Johnathan had also heard her scream of pain!

He snatched up a fear-toxin sprayer, and kicked open the door -- preparing  
to attack the intruders. And Johnathan recognized his foes; they were foolish  
enough to be standing so close together that he could gas them both in one  
shot! All he'd have to do was press the trigger and fire, and he'd plunge both  
cops into their worst nightmares...

...and all he'd have to do was inflict the same fate on Harleen?

...he couldn't do it!

Johnathan dropped the sprayer, and lifted his hands in surrender. Soon, both  
he and Harley had been handcuffed, and Montoya had called for the Arkham  
transport and for the Gotham Zoo to get the hyenas safely stowed away.  
Harvey sneered at Johnathan, "Oh, Straw-Boy? Nice try on the bomb, but no  
cigar. We already defused it well before it was gonna go off."

"It's not fair!" Harley wailed on the trip back to Arkham. "I paid for that food  
fair and square and it's gonna be wasted and I just wanted ta make you  
happy and now you'll hate me forever!" The driver marvelled at the breath  
control it took for her to get all that out.

"Harleen... Harleen! Listen to me, please?" Johnathan tried to reassure her.  
"It's not your fault; even they could notice such a distinctive vehicle. I don't  
hate you... not now, not ever!"

She sniffled, unsuccessful at holding back her tears; Johnathan wished that  
he could kiss them away. But they were both secured so they couldn't touch  
each other, as much as they may have needed that comfort. All too soon, the  
van reached Arkham Asylum and they were separated further; Johnathan to  
his cell, and Harley to Medical where her fractured foot was put in a cast.

Much to Harley's surprise, Poison Ivy was in the cell facing hers. "How'd you  
get back so soon, Red?"

"They took hostages..." Ivy spat out. "The police were in full hazmat gear with  
herbicide tanks -- and they didn't care that they'd poison Harvey, too!"

"Same here, sorta..." Harley drooped. "Except I was the hostage. Course they  
waited till I broke my foot before they went after me?" She sighed. "And Jonny  
said he didn't blame me, but..."

Ivy raised an eyebrow, leaning closer to the door. "Jonny?! And how close did  
you two get?" _I've been waiting years for that sprout of cornsilk to wise up...  
_Ivy thought. _Has she finally done it?_

Harley's smile broke through the clouds. "He's wonderful -- better than anyone's  
ever been to me. Jonny's been so kind and gentle, and he's never tried to hurt  
me, not even once!" Harley leaned forward, bracing herself against the glassy  
door. "Red... is that love? For real?"

Ivy's face softened. "For your sake, Harley... I hope it is."

(to be continued)


	7. Chapter 7

Strange Love, Chapter 7  
by Sunflare2k5

The Joker, considerably the worse for wear, was dragged into Arkham  
by Batman that afternoon. By the time that Medical had finished taping  
him up, it was suppertime. And since his wounds were tended, they  
were supposed to send him out to the cafeteria.

He had to skip his normal grand entrance; the guards were too alert,  
and besides his arms were too sore to fling open the double doors.  
The Joker did spot Harley; as he expected, she was sitting next to Ivy.  
What he didn't expect was that scrawny geek Scarecrow sitting at  
Harley's other side?

"HARLEY!" Joker bellowed, snapping his fingers at her then pointing to  
the floor next to him. How else would he summon his dog, after all?  
"Get over here!"

Harley looked up from her meatloaf, then ever-so-slowly turned to face  
the Joker. "No." she stated firmly.

Most of the talk had already been interrupted by the Joker; the sound  
of Harley's defiance silenced the rest. The soft _whirr_ of Two-Face's Coin  
as he flipped it was heard, though he showed no signs of what it had  
told him to do.

Joker's eyes narrowed. "What do you mean -- 'no'?" he grated. "You  
can't tell me 'no'!"

"Why not?" Harley stood up, looking him right in the eyes. "I don't need  
you anymore -- I don't want you anymore!" She smiled, though it was as  
cruel a smile as he'd ever worn. "I've traded up!" With that, she slipped  
her arm around Scarecrow's waist, just as he stood to offer her support.

The guards quietly called for reinforcements. They knew the Joker was  
wounded -- then again, wounded animals were the most dangerous?

"That's not funny, Harley!" Joker took a step forward, pointing accusingly  
at her. "There's nothing that sad sack of straw can give yo--"

Harley interrupted him. "Oh, Johnathan's given me plenty already! He's  
given me love, and trust, and caring, and devotion..."

"And any puppy can do that." Joker sneered. "It's not like he's much of  
a man, right?"

"Oh, you want to go there, do you?" She gave him a shark's grin. "You  
_claimed_ it was because you were busy with your plans to take down  
the Bat, but you hadn't been able to rev up this Harley for years!"

Two-Face sniggered, not bothering to hide it; more joined in the mocking  
laughter. Joker's fists clenched; he wasn't supposed to be the punchline!

"But no wonder; who could be made happy from such a--" Harley shot a  
withering gaze below Joker's waistline, "**short** routine?"

Killer Croc fell off his bench, roaring with laughter. The Mad Hatter was  
reduced to peeping sounds, torn between amusement and embarrasment.  
Scarecrow just smiled smugly, his hand gliding up and down Harley's side  
as he held her. And Poison Ivy was literally dancing with glee, seeing Harley  
finally tear the Joker up by the roots!

With that, the Joker charged -- only to be met by a barrage of stun-darts  
from the guards. Each of them was a one-shot taser, as several of the  
inmates were too resistant to chemicals for tranqs to always be effective.  
He hit the floor twitching, as the guards yelled for everyone to stand down.  
"You had yer fun -- so we're doing lockdown now. Back to your cells!" And  
for once, no-one resisted the guards or even complained.

Seeing Harley tear down the Joker, was well worth the price...

(to be continued)


	8. Chapter 8

Strange Love, Chapter 8  
by Sunflare2k5

The Joker finally found himself able to move again well after he'd been  
returned to his cell; with his wounds, the stun-darts were more effective.  
He glared out into the darkness, wanting someone -- anyone -- to hurt!  
_No, that's not true... I know who needs to pay for this!_ he then thought.  
_Harley... I made her, I own her, and I'll **break** her before I let anyone else  
play with her!_ He finally drifted off to sleep, and dreamt of torturing her...

Next morning, he was allowed to join the others at breakfast. Well, at  
least technically he was? Harley and the Scarecrow pointedly stayed at  
the opposite end of the cafeteria, along with Two-Face and Poison Ivy.  
And no matter where the Joker tried to sit, the others at the table would  
move away from him... with either a sneer or a snicker. Not wanting his  
food to go cold (it was bad enough already without having it congeal!),  
the Joker finally headed to the corner table. At least Baby Doll was in her  
booster seat, so she couldn't get away from him!

That was until she spotted him... She couldn't move, but she could start  
screaming? "No-NO-**NO**! No Joker here! Don't wanna get Joker Cooties!"

"Joker... Cooties?!" Killer Croc echoed, in confusion.

"Joker has cooties!" Harley crowed. "You _go_, girl!" she grinned at Baby Doll.

He tried to slap Baby Doll into silence, but before Joker could the guards  
nailed him with another round of stun-darts. With a _*splorp*,_ he fell into  
his breakfast tray. A guard reluctantly pulled him out of the food before he  
suffocated -- displaying the Joker with a mustache-and-beardlike mess of  
scrambled eggs, and greasy sausage patties stuck over his eyes.

The laughter of the Arkhamites the previous night was nothing compared  
to what happened now! Scarecrow and Harley were trying to hold each  
other up, as they laughed till they cried. Firefly choked on laughter and  
toast, till a guard saved him. And the Riddler was rolling around on the  
floor in glee; then again, he had some company there!

Joker was dragged off to his cell, and the other inmates were finally calmed  
down again. But while Joker couldn't move, he could still think. _She's made  
a fool of me for the last time! I don't care if I survive it or not, but Harley **dies**!!!_

(The End)


End file.
